I'll be at the losing end once again.

"You will never get a second chance to make a first impression." 

Once you ruin your impression, you're gone. There's no restart, there's no rewind. You be joining in the line of misery business. Nothing is capable of saving me from misery because my misery source is my own mind. It all comes down to expectations, there is this certain expectations list you've on everyone; you expect your other half, best friends, friends, acquaintance and even strangers which expectation would be like not to be rude or some sort. And in my mind, I don't actually believe, no matter what I do or say. I believe I will be left on the sidelines, alone. I can already feel my grief, envision my final time. I can't escape the realm of 'what if' with the short lived images of a different ending. In short, I have no real faith in my own happiness. 

It's a losing war I'm fighting, but I'll struggle to the last of my breath.